Today my baby turns 20 months. Here are some things she knows... She can sing her ABC's. She sings Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. She can count to 10, though often leaves out 7 and 8. Handed a shape book, she recognizes circles, hearts, stars, ovals, squares, diamonds and triangles. When asked, "what color is this?" she knows red, yellow, blue, green, pink, purple, black and white. She points out the letters A, B, E, I, O, T, Y, and F when she sees them. Pretty much any animal I ask her what it is, she knows. And most of the day she speaks to me in three word sentences. Not bad for twenty months....no, pretty darn awesome!
Yesterday we all went to the dentist. In the lobby, Baby Cheekers was demonstrating her skills. The receptionist at the office said, "how old is your baby?" I replied "20 months". She said, "and she is singing the ABC's and pointing out colors. She's a genius!" My response...I had no response. I felt embarrassed. I didn't know what to say. Another woman waiting for her appointment made similar comments about Cheekers and asked if her older sister was the same way. I just smiled shyly and said, "my girls just like to talk." Why did it feel awkward to get a compliment that my baby is smart?
This is such a strange feeling, being ashamed, but that's not the word, of your child's skill level. Is this some new bad form of political correctness...talking about your children's skills is taboo? Every parent (EVERY parent) sizes up the skill charts to make sure their child is on par with the right age group - and hopefully is ahead of the curve. Talking about it though, other than to grandma and grandpa, is just unheard of...and feels wrong.
But why is this a bad thing? I'd sure feel better knowing there are a lot of smart kids running around out there in this next generation than dumb kids. It's our job as parents to teach. We're here to get our children to be the best they can be with what they've got. The obstacle in today's society, though, is the dreaded parental competition that seems to have swelled with each generation. No parent wants to hear that Sally Sue is smarter than my Suzy Q! Now that's the shame.
The reason I feel so comfortable writing so freely about this is, well, Harvard is not knocking down our door. My girls are bright and they may be quick learners, but they don't appear to be on the path to graduate college by age 12...and I wouldn't want them to be. I want my girls to be the best they can, but I especially want them to have the right skills it takes to keep up with this life we live.
I was a very average student, somewhat above average in some subjects. But it didn't come naturally. My biggest problem was (is) concentration. I probably could have been a really, really good student if I'd had better focusing skills. I do not have a photographic memory. And I had to study a lot to pass any test. I found school to be quite challenging and I needed quite a few motivators to succeed. I don't remember how I was early in life, but I know the older I got, the harder it was to keep me motivated.
So while my girls now are both early and good talkers, my husband and I like to encourage this. We're not crazy drilling flash cards type of parents. We just want our kids to learn and grow. And so what is so embarrassing about that? If your child is two and singing the Star Spangled Banner or four and reciting poetry, I think we should be proud parents of this, not shy. Keep these little sponge minds learning now before it takes a prize to get them interested in studying for a history test. Not that I would know what that's about. :)
Oh, and Happy 20 Month Birthday Cheekers...my Little Miss Smarty-Pants! :)
