Toast 2 Mom

Today Was Better

I have been riding a very fast moving train for about three months. And yesterday I had to finally blow off some steam.

Building a business, preparing for our home to be on display for an open house, running a household, raising two girls and all that involves and being a decent wife (and about to celebrate 10 years) has been building and building and building on my sensitivity. And all of a sudden, but not out of no where, the waterworks showed up yesterday - and I just had to let it out. 

Though I'm trying to start this cookie business to show my daughters another side of me - I feel like I've been failing as a mother. Every day they say, "mommy, you're so busy." Though I've been working my tail off researching right and left and trying to line up all the steps to this business, there are several pieces still missing and I think, how will I get this all figured out? 

And something I failed to mention in my blog recently - in the last couple weeks I broke my toe and I bumped Vanna into another car in a parking lot and dented in my bumper. Typically I share all these goofy moments that happen with me day to day. But my head has been so heavily weighted down - and I simply just didn't have time. 

Today was better though. My mind just needed some space. When I get stressed, I feel really insecure and paranoid. It's a horrible feeling and very unproductive. But eventually I start to see the light.... And the light was some much needed quality time with my girls today. I got lots of business stuff accomplished today - but even better I got some extra carved out one-on-one time with my girls - where I really listened to them, not multitask listening. I worked with them, not helped them while I was doing something else. And best of all I did lots of things WITH them not just FOR them. 

And I feel like maybe I'm going to get some decent sleep tonight....

This Time, Four Years Ago

I am a little bit obsessed with documenting my days. When I'm not using this blog to capture moments, I am writing down everything that I did for the day in my calendar. It's kind of a problem because I can't seem to find the right method of documenting my days without doing double work most of the time.

I really like to write things down. I think it looks and feels a bit more authentic to see what I've done by my handwriting - on paper, with a pen. Though in today's day and age, and having the convenience of a calendar on my phone - and coordinating the busy days - my phone seems to be more efficient. Well, it's kind of more efficient. I always have my phone; so in that way recording my plans and such, it just makes more sense to do it electronically. But I still struggle to type short little notes on my phone versus the quickness of writing with pen.

And in all of this detail on my struggles of "how is the best way for me to document my days," I digress.... One of the biggest reasons I love to write down what I've done for the day is to often look back and see what was going on that day, that year.

Being that today is a rather special day, I couldn't help but wonder, what was I doing the last Leap Year. A few things I could recall, but it was more special than I thought. 

On Leap Year, 2008, my sweet Cheekers was celebrating her first month of being born. The other thing I know that was going on that day was I was in Illinois visiting my family. At the time I was on maternity leave, and that was the opportunity to travel and show off my new baby!  That day was the tail end of my visit; so my girls and I joined my Mom, Step-Dad, Dad and Step-Mom for a good-bye dinner at Outback Steakhouse. If I recall correctly, my children were absolutely perfect during the whole dinner. :) 

And today, Leap Year 2012... today was a school day for Sydney. Cheekers and I joined Sydney at her school for lunch today. After school we went to the gym. Wednesday's are swim lesson days. After the gym, we came home. The girls kept me entertained in the kitchen while I experimented in the kitchen with a new recipe I found on Pinterest. They played "the Barbie Princess Fairytale" game while I whipped up din-din. 

So while today doesn't seem all that exciting of a day, I bet in four year it will seem like a wonderful day. The next Leap Year I will have an 8 and 10 year old. I only hope their wish is to play "Barbie Princess Fairytale"....and be in the same room with me. 

Happy Leap Year!

A Shiny New Apple

Tonight I am coming to you live from my new birthday present.... I am now an Apple girl. I got a new MacBook Pro for my birthday from the Hubby. It is very exciting - and a little intimidating. So far the main thing I have noticed are the incredible graphic differences. This new computer is SO crisp. I had no idea. 

I will be attending a few classes in the near future to get a bit better understanding of how to manipulate my new friend. I know it is very slick. I want to be as slick as she is. Hopefully we'll become good friends.

It was a very nice weekend here. Friday, the girls and I had a playdate after school. On Saturday, we went and got my new computer. That night we hosted some friends for dinner. It was our first time to have just a small gathering in our new kitchen. Today we tried to enjoy the nice weather. We played outdoors, had a birthday party, went swimming at the gym and got our Sunday stuff done.

I just sat down an hour ago and began to walk through my new toy. And I thought the best way to break her in would be to blog...been a while. 

We have a lot of fun things planned this week.I will try to take good pictures, write good words and learn new things this week to share. 

Happy Sunday night!

Babies Kitchen Soccer

In that order, that was our weekend. The Hubby is out of town, and I anticipated a very busy weekend of unpacking into our new kitchen. We are seconds away from being totally complete (but really, when is any house project totally complete?) I was going to spend the weekend trying to figure out what should go where....but bigger duties called.

A friend of ours was scheduled Monday to be induced. Her mother in law was arriving Saturday. But baby had bigger plans. I was always a "back up," but the liklihood didn't seem likely -but it was. My friend has two other children. So on Friday I went over to their house while Mom and Dad bee-lined for hospital. On Friday night I played babysitter to four kids, ages, 2, 3, 4 and 5. Yeah, I ordered pizza.

Saturday life got back to "normal" around noon after we saw the new bundle of baby joy. The girls and I came back home to our own chaos of kitchen clean up. I hoped to get done more than I did, but it's better than yesterday. So I gotta go with that.

Then today was Cheekers' first soccer game. The photo below is when it was a happy time. I have to remind myself, and often, that Natalie is not Sydney. They are different girls, with different interests and different approaches to life and different strategies of living. There were many o days of Sydney's beginning soccer experiences where she stood on the field and stood only. Well, Cheekers has that part mastered. I think she spent more time looking at the dirt on her shoes than at the soccer ball. I am going to mark this one down as "no nap Natalie" and see where we go next week.

It's hard because a) she's three b) she wanted to do soccer two monhs ago when we signed up, but that was two months ago c) she's three. The Hubby and I are clear on one thing, you sign up, you finish it. And finishing it means we expect you participate along the way. Natalie is a more headstrong individual. I sent a text to the Hubby as he couldn't make this first game saying, "it's going to be a long soccer season." I hope I'm wrong and next week is better. But before the cold front blew in, here is a happy #49!

P.S. I'll try to be better blogging this week. I've been kind of a writing slacker.

 

Feels Like Summer To Me

We're not even half way through June, not even the first day of summer yet - but it sure feels like summer to me.

I've been given a bit of grief - from someone who will remain nameless :) - over my lack of words so far this month of June. I know my five words and a photo each day don't tell a lot - but it's also a way to try and imagine....OK, yes and a way for me to have a break. :)

I love telling my tales, but my creative energy has been spread among other things lately. And to be perfectly honest, when it comes to summer, I think the days can be filled singular words anyway. Here are a few that come to mind - hot, swimming, popsicles, camps, crafts, playdates, relaxing, ice-cream, lazy, parties, cookouts, fairs, reading, projects, sunscreen, and vacations.

So far our June has been filled with many of those summer-like things. Sydney will begin her second week of Fairy Tale camp tomorrow. Cheekers and I have been exploring the downtown scene during camp time. Our weekends have involved having friends over for cookouts and parties and finding ways to stay cool. And today's hot (almost) summer full of sun Sunday was no exception.

Post-pool-ice-pop-treats!